Friday, March 25, 2011

Dossier! ~part 2

Okay, we did indeed send the dossier on Tues the 21st!  I just got the call that our lovely dossier specialist has not only received the dossier, but has reviewed it and is sending it Friday the 25th, which is now today!  To Beijing!  China!

Oh this is the good stuff!  We can be matched with our daughter any day now!  Excitement city!  I'm so pumped!  How do people adopt several times?  I'm a wreck internally, thinking of little else.  It's like your first pregnancy I suppose.  I wonder, will we get to do this again?  I do hope so, even though like pregnancy, it can be a slow and painful process.  Your will be done Father.  Amen and amen.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Dossier!

Tomorrow we shall send off the dossier, if the good Lord is willing!  We just need a few pictures to add to the pile of papers and we're set!  I need passport photos.  We have our passport, so maybe these will be for visas?  I don't know, and I don't care!  I will get them done and send off the most important papers I've ever had to fill out!  Oh please God, deliver them safely to their destination!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Progress!

So two nights ago I'm up fretting while trying not to, and the very next day I hear that we've been approved for another grant!  Praise God!  Aww, progress.  We will have to wait for it until we get matched with our little Xi Wang, but this is an easier kind of waiting.  Then today I get home to find a note from the postman.  We have a delivery at the post office...an express mail package!  That's our dossier documents coming home to us!  Oh that is very good news!  We can send our dossier this week, as long as all of the documents are in order!  Now I'm back to the hard kind of waiting.  Who is this little girl?!  What is she like?  How old is she?  What size does she wear, because I'm dying to buy her clothes!!!  I do hope that she likes pandas, because I've already bought her 4 of them.  Yes, that makes me blush a little.  Did I mention she already has two baby dolls, her bed is set up with all new bedding, and she has her own tub of clothes in storage?  I'm a fast nester, but wait, not really, it's been 10 months!  (My other 4 children got here in 9 months!)  I need her size so I can keep busy here by filling the closet!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Xi Wang

We want to name you Jada, for the precious Chinese stone, the jade.  Also, Jada is Hebrew for wise, or literally, "he knew."  God knew you were to be part of our family.  I still am calling you Xi Wang (Chinese for hope) because we are hoping for you.  Also, as you'll find out, Hope is your sister's middle name.  We could use that for a middle name, but likely will keep your given name.  It's just hard not getting to know anything about you.  So for now, to settle my troubled mind, I call you Jada Xi Wang. 

Waiting.................................

Oh, I've never been good at waiting.  And I'm finding that waiting for an adoption to materialize is a series of waiting, not just one long wait.  This is what I mean: Right now we are waiting to hear from a grant we applied for, and waiting to get our dossier documents back from the consulate, so we can send them off again and wait to get a match, and we are waiting to see if we can raise enough money for our matching grant, and waiting for our travel date so the 3rd grant might just possibly get approved.

So I check my email, and I check it again, and then re-click that inbox button before I give up and walk away frustrated.  Ohhhh, I'm not good at this.  I try to remind myself that my wait is nothing, that our little girl, our Xi Wang (Hope) is waiting too.  But that doesn't really help anything!  Her waiting for me gives me no peace!  I want, need, have to rescue her!  Now I do realize that she likely is being well cared for, and I pray she is, and I do hope that she doesn't feel the wait.  But this ache is tangible. 

Our little Xi Wang, I am waiting with you.